The days go by, as they do. Some up, some down, all rich with the nuances of fitting so many souls desires and needs into one space at a once.
And I am a victim to comparison as much as the next person. On social media to fill my time as I feed, or sit at the train crossing, or in a stolen minute hiding behind the bathroom door, sometimes desperate sometimes for a connection to the world outside of the daily hubbub, or soothed again by inspiration and camaraderie when its most needed. But I do start to slip back into feeling as though everyone else has it sorted. That although they write of the harder things, look their square still shows a beautiful view.
And I sit on the good days, feeling on top of the world. Feeling blessed and beautiful and whole and growing and strong and literally ready to take on the world. Full of plans and ideas and vision and soul.
But as life tends to. The dip comes. It comes unexpectedly. It comes when its most inconvenient. Always when I’ve committed to something, when the work is needed, when the hours are required, where its late and I am on a schedule, when there are more demands than the already mountainous climb of parenting the way that we choose to. All in.
And so I want to show the truth of those moments too. When the business work is as high as the ceiling, when your mind is racing with words to get out. When there are clients waiting and waiting so patiently. But the baby is teething and then gets sick. When for 4 nights in a row you are sleeping on a roll mat beside the babies crib just so you can fit a hand through the bars and rub their bellies all night.
When your other small needs you more too, when they are feeling the strain of all the change.
When you haven’t spent a moment with your partner for the best part of the last month and its starting to show.
The tiredness sets in and our beautiful parents offer to have the babies so that you can get on top of things. But you know despite all the love in the world, its just not what they need for these few days.
All is as it should be. They’re just ordinary trials for every person on this earth. But they are there. And that is how it is.
I love our life. I love them. I truly, am happy. I see the beauty in the best of times as well as the tired of times. It will all get done. There isn’t any drama. It just is.
It just is.
Hold on to that.
It just is.